This week I thought I'd take a break from Jack and Rachael to share six from a short story I'm writing for a little girl whom coworkers and I "adopted" for Christmas. She's 7 years old, loves playing dress-up, and really loves princesses. As one of my gifts, I thought it would be cool to write a short story about a princess (using her name, of course!). Since I've never written a story for a child, and I raised boys, not girls, I could sure use some feedback! I want this to be something she enjoys! I have no information about her family or living situation, and don't know whether or not her family celebrates Christmas, so I deliberately didn't write about the holiday.
So here's the setup. Princess Imani lives in a kingdom that has been warring with a neighboring kingdom for centuries. She's a friendly, loving child, and the thought of people fighting with each other for so long troubles her. One night three fairies come to her in a dream and send her on a mission that, ultimately, will bring the two peoples together.
Here are the six where the fairies first appear.
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It was a long time before Imani’s eyes closed that night, a long time before dreams came, but they did come, in the form of three fairies. They were small, maybe only six inches tall, with shiny, gossamer wings that fluttered so quickly their edges blurred, like those of a hovering hummingbird. They were dressed in sparkling gowns that reached their ankles, the first in red, the next in blue, and the last in yellow, and the air around them shimmered in a rainbow of colors. Just like the lights she’d seen on the mountaintop.
In her dream Imani held out her hand, and they lighted, delicate little beings that weighed no more than a feather each. “Who are you?” she asked while her heart raced to keep pace with their wings.
In her dream Imani held out her hand, and they lighted, delicate little beings that weighed no more than a feather each. “Who are you?” she asked while her heart raced to keep pace with their wings.
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What do you think? Too grown-up for a 7-year-old? Too scary a concept? Help!
I apologize that I didn't have something from a romance this week, but I hope you enjoyed these six anyway. I'd be appreciative of any feedback you'd like to share!
Be sure to stop by Six Sentence Sunday for more samplings from some amazing authors! 
I liked it, refreshing change of pace. I think my daughters would have enjoyed the story when they were that age. Nice excerpt!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Veronica! I'm really worried I might mess up with this one. I appreciate your input.
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